California Dreaming

I had a crazy weekend, particularly Friday night, when I had a nervous breakdown and then, at the height of the drama, with the house practically literally falling down around my ears, I made the ill-advised decision to watch MSNBC while the Senate and the House of Representatives were in the middle of their last-minute deliberations over the potential government shutdown. I'd write about that now, but I have a strictly-enforced rule of only one psychotic freakout per week, so if you're interested in all that, please check out my Twitter stream. Maybe I'll be able to muster the strength to talk about it later, but for now, let's just say that it is really not a good idea to listen to Congress fighting among themselves like a bunch of four-year-olds who desperately need a nap and some fruit snacks while your roof is leaking into your master bedroom and you are possibly out of heating oil.

{Key quote from the Twitters: "i SWEAR TO GOD, mitch mcconnell and steve forbes are EXACTLY THE SAME PERSON." [sic] Yeah, it was a dark and stormy and profoundly stupid night.}

Photo from www.visitingdc.com

Instead, can we talk about Disneyland? Because last week, before everything in the house seemed to fall apart at once, we finally booked our upcoming trip, and there are probably not words in the English language that adequately express how COMPLETELY FREAKIN' STOKED I am about this vacation.

** Short pause for loud, obnoxious, seal-like clapping **

I really can't remember how much I've mentioned this trip already (I know I discussed it here and here, and it was referenced in passing before and since), but it's going to be a subject of some excitement and angst over the coming weeks -- 6 weeks and 2 days until we leave, to be exact. G lived in California for a while when he was young (Army brat) but Disneyland is one of those far-off, exotic-type places that I have always wanted to visit.

And now I'm finally going, with my two favorite people in the whole wide world, one of whom is way more excited about having lunch with a bunch of princess-types than a 35-year-old father ought to be.

(Okay, maybe I am projecting, a little bit. Maybe the one who is most excited about this particular character dining experience is an almost-37-year-old strident radical feminist who hates the Princess-Industrial Complex and everything it stands for and yet she still cannot contain her unbridled joy at the prospect of GETTING MY PICTURE TAKEN WITH ARIEL OMGOMGOMG SQUEE! Ahem.)

Plus, there's that whole wedding thing that will be happening while we're out there. We're going to Disneyland first, and then on the weekend we're moving from Anaheim to the Lagua Beach-Woods-Hills area (I can't tell them apart, honestly, and nobody I know who's been to California can tell me the difference either) for what looks like it's going to be a spectacular shindig. I've seen pictures of the place where the wedding will be held and it looks like a movie set. I am going to be Speidi adjacent. It's kind of fantastic. I sort of can't believe that we're invited. I'm going to try really hard not to lose my mind, but I have to tell you -- it's going to be a long six weeks.

In the meantime, we have eleventy billion things to do. We need to shore up details -- will we have to rent a car? Is there anywhere that we can get a discount on our park tickets? What do we have to do to get Shae on stage as part of the Jedi Training Academy attraction? Can I convince anyone that I am actually a 12-year-old so that I can participate? Will I ever find clothes that fit before we leave? How much sunscreen are we going to need? Is her car booster seat FAA approved? Could I maybe just go to the airport now and hang out there until it's time to leave? Would anybody even notice?

So I apologize in advance if I sound like I have a one-track mind. Hopefully we'll be able to get someone to come fix our roof soon and then I'll be able to talk about that marvelous misadventure, but it's supposed to rain for six out of the next ten days, so I am not holding my breath, and you probably shouldn't either.