I Wear My Sunglasses at Night

Originally uploaded by

This is just cuteness personified. No explanations necessary, really. Oh: and I totally covet Kim's top here. Haven't you heard that Kim is the new Black*?

* Ba-da-DUM.


Splendor in the Grass

Walking with Pop-Pop
Originally uploaded by

Actually ... I'm not sure what that movie's about, so maybe this title is inappropriate for a picture of a toddler taking a walk with her grandfather? But I don't know how else to describe this. I love my kid, and I love that she loves everybody, and I love that she never gets tired of doing things, any old things, with people who are important to me.

Also? Next time I take a picture like this, she'll probably be waist-high to my dad. She's growing like the proverbial weed -- already she's 33" tall (two-foot-nine FTW!). She's growing so much, so fast, and we can't hardly keep up. It's truly astonishing. Kids are fucking amazing. Christ on a cracker, why did we wait so long for this?

PS -- Yes, that is my Daddy wearing pink, thankyouverymuch. Real men ROCK the pink polo shirts.


Splish Splash

Swimming Lesson
Originally uploaded by

Cupcake had her first swimming lesson over Memorial Day weekend, and so I am pleased to report that "Operation Ariel" is now officially underway. Before the end of the summer I will have that kid in the Olympics, so help me Jeebus.

It is extremely cool that the baby has no fear of the water, and it is also a little terrifying -- she reminds me very much of my cousin Jason when he was her age. Not sure whether anyone remembers or not, but we used to call Jay "Dangermouse" because the kid was never afraid of anything. I think he's broken half the bones in his body, and a good 75% of those injuries started with "Hey guys! Watch this!" Occasionally, as an homage but also because it is oh-so-apt, G and I will refer to the baby the same way.

One of the most vivid memories of my late-childhood-early-adolescence-nascent-emo-period was the day I first associated "bad things" with "XX person having a stroke." Jason was maybe two at the time, not yet three I don't think, and as per usual, he managed to wriggle his way out of his swimming bubble. The rest of us were playing War or Slapjack or one of those other summertime card games where the only rules are noise and anarchy and accusing each other of cheating while we gnoshed on our cheese sandwiches and fudgesicles.

Nobody was paying much attention to Jay, or no more attention than normal, when all of the sudden we heard a tiny, evil giggle, then a splash, then -- screaming, caterwauling, noise the likes of which you have never heard. Grandmothers and great-grandmothers and their canasta cards went flying, sunglasses ended up in plastic Tupperware tumblers of iced tea, everybody made for the side of the pool, and then ... it was over.

Aunt Kathy was soaking wet, fully dressed, holding Jason, who was grinning like a maniac and already figuring how and when to do that again, because that? Was awesome. My grandmother sighed, lit another cigarette, reapplied her iodine and baby oil, and kept saying over and over, "I thought Kathy was going to have a stroke," something that I have said at least once per week for the last twenty-five years or so. I have no idea where kids pick these things up.


Promises, Promises

It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you without a strong rhyme to step to ... but I beg your pardon, I never promised you a rose garden. Words get in the way, and time sure flies when you're all jacked up. You're older than you've ever been, and now you're even older. These aren't the droids you're looking for.

All of this is code for: Haven't taken the pictures off the camera yet, or edited the videos, but soon, pinky swears. There just aren't enough hours in the day, or enough days in the long weekend, and I am right out of vacation time. Yes, I know how much I suck. But you know you love me anyway.

Soon, our long national nightmare will be over. Thanks for your patience at this difficult and troubling time. XOXO.


Little Person Update

... and this time, it's not about the baby. Last time I updated anyone on my WoW main, she was a level 28, just a weensy little thing trying to find her way in the world. Now, she is a level 56, practically an old salt, with powers the likes of which you cannot hardly believe. In some areas, I have the ability to kill creatures with my bare hands. My herbalism and alchemy skills are as high as they can get without going to Outland, which will be happening soon -- I just need to get a little bit higher level. I spend a lot of time exploring the map on the back of "Gilda the Robochicken," a/k/a my [Red Mechanostrider]. I speak in "code" so that I know what it means when stuff is in square brackets with blue lettering, and I have not only become an Officer in my Guild, but I am also the Webmaster.

Or, in short, I have become an even bigger nerdo than ever, thanks for asking. And if not for the baby, I'd be a level 70 already: so thanks, kiddo, for saving Mommy some grief.


Short But Sweet

Mother's Day
Originally uploaded by

I have been having Internet problems -- can't seem to work anything. I did a nice little photostream that was supposed to be here, but I can't seem to get it to embed properly. Here is one of my favorite pictures from the batch -- please to enjoy! Once I am done having tremendous difficulties with my life-style, I will get back to you.

(If you click on the picture, it will take you to my flickr photostream, where you can see any number of goofy assorted pictures I've taken, including the one one of me "Simpsonizing" myself. Long story. Just consider yourself warned.)