Oh. Dear. God.

Now it looks like we're going to need a lawyer. Christ on a bike! Why can't I get just a small break, just once in my goddamn life? Why? Is that so much to ask? Forfuckingoutloud!

Took a sleeping pill last night, but I don't feel any better this morning. I slept OK, but I don't feel "rested." chembug didn't sleep much, I already know it. I am afraid that he is going to hate me more than anything, because I am the one who suggested that we start looking for houses in the first place. Because I am the one who fell in love with this particular house. Because I am the one who wanted to fight for it. Of course, I had no idea it would ever get like this.

Can't say I blame him, really - I blame myself too. But we can't afford NOT to fight to get our money back now. The trouble is ... what we both really want is the HOUSE. Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn. With all apologizes to Arthur - would it save everyone a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?

Cigarette count: 2. Having another one in about 20 minutes.

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